Проверьте пожалуйста есть ли ошибки.
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am interested in becoming a volunteer in Education International and I would be grateful if you could give me some further information.
First of all, I would appreciate it if you could tell me in any particular locality I will be working. Could you also let me know what age you look for young people? I would also like to know what subjects need to be taught. Furthermore, I am interested what is included in free accommodation. Finally, could you tell me how much will I earn?
Thank you in advance for your assistance. I look forward to your reply.
Yours faithfully,
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am interested in becoming a volunteer in Education International and I would be grateful if you could give me some further information.
First of all, I would appreciate it if you could tell me in any particular locality I will be working. Could you also let me know what age you look for young people? I would also like to know what subjects need to be taught. Furthermore, I am interested what is included in free accommodation. Finally, could you tell me how much will I earn?
Thank you in advance for your assistance. I look forward to your reply.
Yours faithfully,
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По-моему там, где есть would и if - could уже не надо. просто if you tell mewhat age of young people you are looking for
а так норм, пять бы поставила.