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Mirrow, mirrow on the wall... In the beginning, I put it down to a simple case of exam nerves. My daughter Sarah had just turned sixteen and was studying hard for her GCSEs*. I knew she'd do well, as she was top of the class in all her subjects at school and had always been a high achiever. But as the time for the exams drew nearer, her behaviour started to change - drastically.
Sarah became sullen and withdrawn. She wasn't the lively teenager I knew. But the most worrying thing of all was that she was hardly eating anything. She refused to eat with the rest of the family and was having only light snacks in her room. At the time I didn't want to make a big deal of it, as I thought I'd just make her more anxious about her exams. I was convinced that once she'd taken the exams, she would soon settle down and everything would get back to normal.
But it didn't. In fact, it got worse. By the middle of the summer, Sarah had become very skinny and pale. She also had wild mood swings, bursting into tears or becoming enraged by the slightest thing. I should say at this point that my initial reactions to this situation weren't very helpful. We had huge fights about her being too thin and I tried to persuade her to eat more, but she just turned her nose up at everything I offered her. When nothing I said or did seemed to make any difference, I really felt at a complete loss about what else I could do or who I could turn to. I was desperate. After a lot of thought I realised that I would have to try other tactics. Screaming and tearing my hair out were definitely not improving the situation.
I started by looking up eating disorders on various websites, to get as much information as I could, and what I found out almost scared me to death. Anorexia nervosa is a condition that typically affects teenage girls. There are a variety of reasons as to why it can develop, but it is usually said to be because of a distorted body image and lack of self-esteem. Some young women think they are too fat, even when they are not, and feel that they are unattractive or worthless. The media have been accused of playing a role in the rise of eating disorders in recent years, because of the way they portray women. Using underweight models in adverts in glossy magazines and on television may be a factor in encouraging young women to equate thinness with beauty, glamour and success.
I was shocked to discover that this disease can seriously damage the heart and make bones brittle and easy to break. However, the most frightening aspect of the condition is that in 10% of cases it leads to the death of the sufferer. The information was terrifying, but it helped me to come to terms with the fact that someone with a severe eating disorder needs love and support and urgent medical attention.
It took a lot of calm and gentle persuasion to get my tearful daughter to agree to go with me to a doctor who specialises in eating disorders. That was two years ago and the road to recovery has been long and hard. Sarah spent two months in hospital to get her weight back to normal and since then she has been seeing a psychiatrist to help her deal with the underlying causes of the problem.
It was tough for me, too. I felt very guilty about her illness - that somehow it was my fault, and I was a bad mother who had caused her daughter so much anxiety she had started to starve herself. But we've managed to get through it together. Now Sarah is looking forward to starting university, the colour has returned to her cheeks and she is back to being the vibrant young woman she was before the whole dreadful nightmare started.