ПОМОГИТЕ ПЛИЗ, ПРАВИЛЬНО ЛИ ЛОГИЧЕСКИ И ГРАММАТИЧЕСКИ НАПИСАНО?
Hello everyone! I'm glad to see! Now I will tell you about myself, as well as my plans for the future.
My name is Sasha, I'm 23 years old. I was born in the Primorsky Territory, in the village of Pokrovka. I moved to Perm to stay with my relatives when I was 1 year old.
We study many different subjects at the institute. But my favorite subject is tourism geography and management.
In the future, I plan to become a tourism manager at «Pegas Touristik». It seems to me that this is the most interesting and entertaining profession in the world. «Pegas Touristik» is a Russian tour operator founded at Moscow in 1994.
To work in a company, you need to have an appropriate liberal arts education and be a well-rounded person.
In this profession, intelligence, foresight, and sociability are needed in order to correctly understand the requirements of people and choose the best option for them.
I will be successful in this company because I believe that I have the necessary knowledge and skills to help me achieve good results in my work.
In conclusion, I want to say that the profession suits me, because I am attending, I have good knowledge in the field of geography, I like to communicate with people, travel and have experience in sales.
Hello everyone! I'm glad to see! Now I will tell you about myself, as well as my plans for the future.
My name is Sasha, I'm 23 years old. I was born in the Primorsky Territory, in the village of Pokrovka. I moved to Perm to stay with my relatives when I was 1 year old.
We study many different subjects at the institute. But my favorite subject is tourism geography and management.
In the future, I plan to become a tourism manager at «Pegas Touristik». It seems to me that this is the most interesting and entertaining profession in the world. «Pegas Touristik» is a Russian tour operator founded at Moscow in 1994.
To work in a company, you need to have an appropriate liberal arts education and be a well-rounded person.
In this profession, intelligence, foresight, and sociability are needed in order to correctly understand the requirements of people and choose the best option for them.
I will be successful in this company because I believe that I have the necessary knowledge and skills to help me achieve good results in my work.
In conclusion, I want to say that the profession suits me, because I am attending, I have good knowledge in the field of geography, I like to communicate with people, travel and have experience in sales.
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Answers & Comments
1) I am glad to see you нужно дописать, а то не понятно, что вы имеете в виду и к кому обращаетесь; если это формальное письмо, избегайте сокращений
2) Now I will tell you about myself, as well as my plans for the future. Лучше сказать так: I would like to tell you about myself and my plans for the future. Потому что предложение слишком "по-русски" написано, если вы понимаете, о чем я.
3) Снова: уберите сокращения и поставьте их в полную форму ( не I'm, а I am). Можете оставить, если это письмо друзьям/ровесникам. Если оно деловое — то в начале не hello, а good morning/afternoon/evening.
4) I will be successful in this company because I believe that I have the necessary knowledge and skills to help me achieve good results in my work. Ещё одно "русское" предложение. Не то чтобы ваше предложение неправильное, но как альтернативу представлю более короткий вариант: I have enough knowledge and skills to achieve good results in my work, so I am sure I will bring success to the company.
5) In conclusion, I want to say that the profession suits me, because I am attending, I have good knowledge in the field of geography, I like to communicate with people, travel and have experience in sales. — наверное, вы спешили, когда писали. In conclusion, I can say that I have great communication skills and knowledge in the field of Geography as well. I am a hardworking, observant person and that is why this profession is the right one for me.
В целом письмо (или, может, вы будете рассказывать этот текст) написано довольно хорошо. В принципе можете оставить более длинные предложения, но, как по мне, не нужно добавлять слишком много слов за раз. Удачи вам. Пишите, если будут вопросы.