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Picnics are popular with women and children and some men who know how to make a fire. Children are fond of picnics chiefly because, as a rule, there are no tables at picnics and consequently no table manners and because they have an excellent opportunity to eat things that do not agree with them. Since picnic lunches are always just about the same and therefore require little imagination, women do not have to trouble about thinking up a meal. Much depends, of course, upon the day. Typical picnic weather is of three kinds. Either it is dark and threatening with occasional showers in the morning, clearing in the afternoon or it is hot and clear in the morning, with thunder showers in the afternoon; or there is a steady drizzle all day long. But as most of the lunch is prepared ahead of time, nothing much can be done about it. After all, there is not much choice between eating a picnic lunch that has waited a day or two and getting a soaking. Picnic grounds are usually situated on a body of water at some high altitude. One of these features is essential, for no picnic can be a success unless the children have something to fall into, or fall off. Also, a body of water naturally suggests taking fishing tackles along. No fish was ever known to have been caught on a picnic, but fishing serves as an excellent excuse for getting out of the way while the heavy work is being done. Quite the most important feature of the picnic is the lunch. Fried chicken is always popular ... Then there should be hard-boiled eggs. Almost everything else that comes in a can or a paper bag is good for a picnic lunch. These containers are very important as, after the contents have been eaten, they are strewn about and identify the picnic ground. Ginger ale, too, should be brought along to remind you that you left the bottle-opener at home. However, there is always at least one person present who knows how to open a bottle on a rock. As soon as the food and other equipment have been unpacked it is in order to start a fire. Collecting wood provides occupation for people who do not know how to amuse themselves. After the lunch has been eaten a picnic is mostly anticlimax. But there is always the possibility of someone nearly getting drowned or running into a hornets’ nest or twisting an ankle. However, you must remain until well into afternoon, or you may not appear to have had a good time. To make matters worse, someone will suggest singing. Picnics, whatever may be said against them, have their advantages. At least they reawaken in the hearts of many the truth of the old saying that there is no place like home.
(S. M. G. From “Humour Variety. Stories, Jokes, Cartoons”, No. 2, London​